I have been married for just over a year now and many of my friends are getting engaged and getting married. This made me think about the proposal process. Why do men kneel when they propose? My goal in this is to set up a clear theological framework of what kneeling means in proposal and why we do it because, to be honest, the only reason why I knelt when I proposed was because that’s just what men do. I didn't think about what it meant, or what it should mean. Here are some thoughts.
Why do men kneel when they propose?
Here are not some reasons why men should kneel to propose:
· We do not kneel out of worship (Matthew 4:10)
· We do not kneel out of pride (1 Peter 5:5)
· We do not kneel out of selfishness (James 3:16)
· We do not kneel out of manipulation (Philippians 2:3)
· We do not kneel because it looks good (1 Samuel 16:7)
Kneeling is very close to bowing. Men, we should not idolize our girlfriend, our fiancée, or our wife. We are to worship the one true God Jesus Christ. Our kneeling when we propose should not be an act of worship.
Kneeling to propose is seen as romantic. While being romantic can be a good thing, it can also be a thing people use in order to manipulate their spouse. Manipulation is not love. Manipulation is using someone to get what you want. This is hardly loving.
If what you are concerned about is the outside appearance of your relationship, then you are in for a rough marriage. Do not sugar coat your relationship by doing things the right way in front of people in order for them to believe your relationship is healthy. Live a godly relationship by the power and grace of Christ. It is for freedom Christ has set us free.
Here are some reasons why men should kneel to propose:
· We kneel in service (1 Peter 4:10)
· We kneel in leadership (1 Corinthians 11:3)
· We kneel in headship (Ephesians 5:23)
· We kneel in selflessness (Ephesians 5:25)
· We kneel in humility (Colossians 3:12)
· We kneel in love (Ephesians 5:28)
· We kneel in tenderness (1 Peter 3:7)
The married man should always seek after the interests and needs of his wife above his own. He should be aware of how to best serve his wife, because this is being obedient to God. Jesus displayed a style of leadership that is service driven. He even washed the feet of his disciples, including Judas Iscariot who betrayed him.
The Bible says the husband is the head of the household. But what does this mean? To love and serve his wife like Christ loves and serves the church, even to the point of death. Marriage is not about you, but about living to fulfill the needs of your spouse in order to be obedient and submissive to Christ.
The husband must be willing to admit he is wrong. The husband must be willing to say, “I’m sorry.” The husband must be willing to repent. Ultimately everything we do should come from a Gospel driven heart where we love the Lord and are obedient to him. This includes how we treat our wife.
The reason why behind the reasons why we kneel to propose:
· We kneel in obedience (Philippians 2:10)
I kneel in obedience to the living God who has called me to a life of love and obedience. I kneel in obedience to Christ. My kneel in submission to Christ leads me to kneel in humble service to my wife.
"Oh come, let us worship and bow down; let us kneel before the Lord, our Maker!" Psalm 95:6